You will get nothing and like it, Orange-Man.

Friday, August 17, 2007

High School Highlights: Cedric The Entertainer is fresh to death

Let there be no mistake about it: Cedric Everson runs the show. He hustled the recruiting sites to get his name out, he stone cold tells the coaching staff what will be up with this "redshirt" bullshit, and now, ladies and gentlemen, he makes Usher look like a stiff bitch.

Honestly, Cedric might be my favorite Hawkeye right now. He's a perfect blend of athleticism and audacity, the likes of which we haven't seen since Kahlil "The Thrill" Hill drove both Iowa and their opponents crazy (think Bracey Wright in cleats) from '98-'01. It doesn't matter if he ever plays a single down; Cedric, you are The Entertainer.

Cedric motherfucking Everson, folks. Have a good weekend.


Run Up The Score said...

Sweet Jesus.

In a related story, Ced claims that he'll be dancing on tour for either Justin Timberlake, Janet Jackson, Madonna, or R. Kelly...but he'll probably just back out at the last minute and end up doing The Lawnmower on tour with Kenny G.

Oops Pow Surprise said...

We deeply resent the implication that Iowa is the Kenny G to Michigan State's Justin Timberlake. You, sir, have invited disaster upon your school of choice on October 6.

Run Up The Score! said...

Under that interpretation, the person who deserves the apology is Justin Timberlake.

Anyway, first team to three safeties wins!